Wednesday, 15 June 2016


So many people tell me
Who I am is wrong
Yet they often do not see
That I do not belong
I do not belong
In their heterosexual world
I do not belong
In their cis-gendered world
So many years I've struggled
So long I have grieved
I have tried and I wrestled
A sigh of relief -
Reparative therapy
Didn't solve my problems
Support group only gave me
A perfect in-group emblem
When I turned back to God
He then made me whole
When I listened to the Lord
He restored my soul
When I looked to the Scriptures
I looked to them all
God showed me a clear picture
of life after the fall
A conservative pastor
preaching just one morning
caught my attention proper
I was intently listening
The story of Ruth -
Her promise to Naomi
Who seemed so aloof
Till she asked her to leave. See -
This was what Ruth said:
"Where you go, I will go too
Your God will be my God,
Your people, my people.
We shall never be apart,
Until death do us part."
With this Ruth clung to her tightly,
"Notice, come see this,
the word 'clung'," he said gently,
"In Hebrew it is,
"The same as a man leaving,
cleaving to his wife.
Do you now see the meaning?
A covenant for life."
The message stuck with me
I could not shake it off
Could this possibly be
Queerness never heard of?
Was this a story
I could model after?
Was this about me?
I wanted to ask the pastor.
I never got the chance to
Yet it brings me hope
When they throw me Scripture, like they always do,
Remembering helps me cope.

Reflections on my friend's suicide (8 months on)

Photo by  Kat J  on  Unsplash In 2 days' time, it'll be 8 months since the day she passed. And tonight, instead of falling aslee...