Just came back from dinner and service at church earlier. I love my church. Despite it all, this is home. I came to church in 2006 and have been here ever since. This is home truly, where I know must be; this is where I won't be alone, for this is where I know it's home. Haha.
Anyway, some have told me that City Harvest Church was kinda homophobic in the past but I never knew that side of CHC. All I know is that my pastor is one of the most accepting and loving people I know. Why do I say this? Well, even before I had what I call my "orientation conflict", in the 20th anniversary message right there in front of 20,000 people in the Singapore Indoor Stadium, he declared,
"We accept everyone, male or female, young or old, gay or straight, ...."
And I was like, "What did he say?!?!?!"
That just sealed it for me. Years later, I remembered that and I felt safe being in church.
Things in my cell group could be rosier. I am out to my entire cell, but some pretend they don't know. (To be fair to them, I think they just don't know how to respond, so it ain't really their fault. I'm asking for too much.) The closest ones tell me that I am very brave and are extremely supportive, and without them, I might not have killed myself but would probably have done something drastic in those desperate moments where I struggled so much with this SSA (same-sex attraction) thing.
Well, that's all for today folks, gotta go sleep to go visit a different church to hear a different testimony tomorrow.